The Boss Whisperer, Part I - Mood Matters. A Lot.

You know who they are. You don't want to admit it, but you envy them. They have ability to stay in the good graces of even the most difficult bosses. Somehow, they manage to safely navigate temperamental waters. Even when they fall short, they survive and thrive, and perhaps to your dismay, maintain the boss' ultimate confidence. They have a stranglehold on the best assignments and are invited into the circle of trust. As a result, they rise to the top. They are the boss whisperers.

What is this magical hold they have on the head honcho? What deal have they made with the devil? And what do they know that you don't know? More importantly, what are they doing that you are not?

At a recent training on emotional intelligence I shared a story about a former colleague who gave me an early glimpse into the ways of a boss whisperer. One clever twist to the training was in order to encourage sharing while preserving privacy, we were instructed to refer to "my turtle" when mentioning any difficult characters. This colleague and I worked in an office with a senior turtle who was renowned for foul moods. You could walk into turtle's office announcing you had turned water into wine, but if turtle was having a bad day, their scathing words would turn your wine into vinegar. One day, I learned this lesson the hard way and left turtle's office shell shocked. I shared this experience with my colleague who was sympathetic and kindly shared his strategy for avoiding such disasters. He had cultivated a good relationship with turtle's admin and before he would even consider walking into the lion's den, he would call and ask, "How's the weather? Is the coast clear?" And if the skies were stormy, he'd wait until a sunnier moment to drop by. No surprise he was able to cultivate a fine relationship with this turtle, as well.

His method seems so simple in hindsight, but on a deeper level it illuminates the fact that most of us don't seriously take into account other people's moods. We operate mostly on the level of managing and acting according to our own moods. As for others, we mistakenly assume that good news should always be received well and that bad news, well...less well. In doing so, we fail to recognize the powerful filtering effect a person's mood has on how ANY information is received. The boss whisperer recognizes that theory and logic are best left for textbooks and Star Trek characters. In the real world, our emotions run us.  

Here are some EZPZ steps you can take to deal with the turtles in your life and maybe even become a boss whisperer yourself.

1. Time of Day

Most people have a fairly consistent pattern to when they are feeling good versus feeling low. Ask yourself are they a morning person or a night owl? What part of the day seems to be the most over scheduled? Pay attention to the windows when your turtle is in a good mood and maximize your interactions during those times.

2. Heed the Signals

Pay attention to the verbal and nonverbal signals your turtle definitely gives off that signal whether they are in a good or bad mood. Ask yourself what does your turtle's body language look like when they are in a good mood vs. a bad one? The funny thing is when you stop obsessing about your own mood and start paying more attention to others' moods, you may be surprised at how obvious the signs are.

3. Learn the Triggers

What are the external events that can send your turtle into a tailspin? You don't have to be Sherlock to deduce whether it is a call from a family member, a meeting with their own turtle, or a demoralizing sports team defeat. Before you write this off as silly and irrelevant, think about the last time something put you in a really bad mood at work. Was it purely work-related or more personal in nature? Awareness of your turtle's triggers will help you from becoming collateral damage.

Flex your boss whisperer muscles by exercising your awareness of their moods and factoring them into your interactions. In other words...

"Manage mood, lest it manage you."

If you try this, would love to hear how it went. Good luck!

Next post Saturday, 6:30 a.m.

Should I Take This Personally?

First, a confession. In my household, my acting ability has been widely panned - mostly because of my inability to fake an expression on demand. Now, I initially disputed this fervently, until "the test." I thought surely everyone must be exaggerating so let's get some evidence. So we took a series of pictures of my face as a different emotion was called out, "Anger, Grief, Joy, Terror, etc." I have the pictures somewhere, but it's entirely too humiliating to share with you. Basically, I just look kind of sleepy in all of them.

 So although you'll never see me on Inside the Actor's Studio, I do enjoy the show. Especially the part at the end where James Lipton asks each actor the same set of questions. You know the ones...

1. What is your favorite word?
2. What is your least favorite word?
3. What turns you on?
4. What turns you off?
5. What sound or noise do you love?
6. What sound or noise do you hate?
7. What is your favorite curse word?
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
9. What profession would you not like to do?
10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?

It's quick, sometimes predictable, sometimes not, equal parts funny and sad, and always a treat. I recently came across an article that talked about how a lot of the answers are the same. It also mentions a clever video, by Jordan Laws, which spliced several different actors' answers together to highlight the similarities. I found the video thoroughly entertaining, despite the responses to question #9 and the fact that I'm a lawyer who works for an accounting firm.

Take a look. Note that question #7 requires a curse word.

Next post Saturday, 6:30 a.m.

 

Spice Up Your Value

Perhaps it's my copious consumption of science fiction, but every once in a while an article about robots and AI replacing humans freaks me out! Technology moves faster than ethics and faster still than government, so I'm not holding my breath for a job savior. In the past, manufacturing jobs have been a common casualty of technology, but increasingly even knowledge workers such as lawyers are on the chopping block. Please, hold your applause! It hurts my feelings. :p

My nightmare is to end up like this guy, with two "Efficiency" hawks perched across the table.

Question: "What would you say... you do here?"

Answer: "I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS!!!"

"But wait, Joe, I make professional judgments that a computer is not qualified to make. Or wait, the quality I deliver from my years of learning X craft cannot be easily replicated by a non-human."

To which I would say, you are probably right. And I hope you continue to be right for the foreseeable future. However, history shows us that perceived value can change drastically. During the Middle Ages peppercorns were worth more than gold. In fact, peppercorns were accepted as legal currency, like a ducat. l love the sound of that word. Say it with me, "ducat." But seriously, even today the Dutch have an expression, "pepeduur," which means "pepper expensive" and is used to describe something very pricey.

Pepper and other spices played an early role in the success of what many consider the first multinational corporation - Vereenigde Oost-Indische Compagnie (VOC) or as it is known in the English-speaking world, the Dutch East India company. It was the first company to issue stock, which was traded in Amsterdam in the first open-air stock market. The VOC monogram was possibly the first globally-recognized corporate logo, stamped on various corporate items ranging from cannons to coins. Based on feedback from a Dutch colleague Luc, I should note that the VOC's historical accomplishments are accompanied by criticisms surrounding the company's commercial monopoly, business practices and social impacts.

At its height, the VOC was the most valuable company in history - when adjusted to today's dollars it was worth $7.4 trillion dollars. In comparison, in early 2017, one of, if not the most valuable companies in the world, Apple, has a market capitalization of around $700 billion dollars. The pepper in our pantry must not have gotten the memo because while spices are not cheap, they certainly aren't worth their weight in gold anymore.

So what can lessons can we learn from the humble peppercorn, which went from local spice, to empire builder, to sale item at the local grocery?

Lesson #1. Value is not fixed, but temporary. This is the most important lesson. Your value can change at any moment. There are market forces outside your control that can drastically influence the way your services are valued. This may seem obvious, but if you really stop and think about this, it is a sobering fact.

"So what are some of the factors that might affect the value of my services?"

Lesson #2. New is valuable. Do your services address a new and growing need?

Lesson #3. Rare is valuable. How easy is it to find someone or something (e.g., a robot or program) to do your work?

Lesson #4. Pleasing is valuable. In what way do your services improve life for customers, your boss and the company?

Lesson #5. In demand is valuable. Just being rare does not create value if no one wants what you have to offer. But when something is rare, coupled with high demand, the price people are willing to pay skyrockets.

So while we can't stop progress or technology, we can take some time to think deeply about how our own value is generated. We can take steps to grow in a way that generates more value. This might include learning new skills or shifting roles or industries. As an advanced tactic, we can perceive trends as they are happening, anticipate new areas of value and position ourselves to take advantage ahead of time. I will spare you the fantastic, but fantastically overused Wayne Gretzy quote. Instead, I'll leave you with this...

What gift do you think a good servant has that separates them from the others?

It's the gift of anticipation. And I'm a good servant. I'm better than good. I'm the best. I'm the perfect servant.

I know when they'll be hungry and the food is ready. I know when they'll be tired and the bed is turned down. I know it before they know it themselves.

~Mrs. Wilson, from the movie Gosford Park

Next post next Saturday, 6:30 a.m.